It’s the end of school holidays, and I’ve managed to get very little done in terms of writing-career progression or children-fun time progression. It would make complete sense to work towards accomplishing small goals in each area: an hour in the morning for work then an hour to the kids, a morning for work, an afternoon for the kids. It seems so simple!
We’ve all heard of the buddy system, but have you heard of the bud-i system?
When you go to a theme park and you want to go on a roller coaster, you grab your buddy, you egg each other on, and you keep an eye on each other so that you won’t get lost. When you get off, you’ve had your ups and downs, but you feel like you’ve done something. Gotten somewhere. This is what writing is like for me when I’m following my routine.
But with the bud-i system, my routine has been interrupted. It’s very much like going on those nauseating tea cup rides. I would come on with you, but I just ate a hot dog, but I like to keep my lunch down, but I find it really rude placing my butt in crockery that a giant might have to drink out of one day.
Whatever the reason, with the bud-i system, you feel you are going nowhere, stuck on loop, feeling sick when it seems it will never end.
I have to work, but I have to spend time with the kids.
I have to spend time with the kids, but I have to work.
I have to work, but I feel guilty about not spending time with the kids.
So what do I do? I get stuck on loop and get neither done. And at the end of the day, I’m unfulfilled and nowhere closer to my goals, feeling sick about it and cranky. Which starts another loop led by But’s friend, Because.
I’m cranky and depressed because I didn’t write.
I didn’t write because I was cranky and depressed.
When the kids go back to school, I have to be wary of a new bud-i loop that’s been getting a little too cosy with my consciousness. That’s another thing, when I’m worrying about all the things not getting done, without getting them done, I have too much time to think.
I have to write today, but I have to get those agent queries started.
I have to get those queries done, but I have research to do.
I have research to do, but I have to write today.
They are all excuses; they are all crutches.
I wrote a post a few months back talking about how if I was going to take time off writing, I was going to make the most of that time. And that’s what I should have done.
Maybe I need a buddy to drag me back to the roller coaster.
How do you cope when your routine is interrupted? Hopefully, better than me 🙂